This story written by ‘Mama Holiday’ columnist Tracey Spicer appeared in Fairfax Traveller online 27 April:
I found it via a Facebook social media link on the same day. The story quickly attracted a lot of attention in the Twittersphere and other social media vehicles.
At first I thought it deserved nothing more than a couple smart-arse retorts such as ‘I don’t want my kids sitting next to a man on a… life raft, or iceberg, or battleground or jet ski,’ considering the heading was a bad choice of words stuck on as click-bait.
Then I grew increasingly incensed over the content.
I often travel unaccompanied on planes. I like it that way. I get peace and quiet, time to self-reflect in the cocooned space that is modern jet travel while catching up on B-grade films I’m happy never to have spent money to see at the cinema. It’s a guilty pleasure.
I’m less happy when I’m seated next to a crying baby or worse still, an obnoxious brat who kicks my seat from behind or spills a drink on me while he/she is ignored by his/her parents.
You see, parents are the key indicators here. I’ve noticed children typically do their worst when the parents are in close proximity.
In my opinion, when kids travel alone, they’re quieter and better behaved. I’ve observed how well looked after they are by crew members and if they’re lucky, they’ll have an interested adult nearby who will actually pay them attention and listen to what they have to say.
Over the years, I’ve met a few inquisitive and funny kids travelling solo on planes. Conversations are usually brief (I’m busy) but occasionally I hear something remarkable. Viewing the world through a child’s eyes can be a rare pleasure.
This happens less frequently these days.
I’ve grown more sensitive about perceived appearances. It’s not in my best interest to chat with unaccompanied kids on planes.
As a white middle aged man, I realise I’m guilty before charged according to Spicer, Virgin Airlines and just about anyone else in the western world who links paedophilia with men travelling unaccompanied on a plane.
The insulting implication is this: So I must be closely monitored when in close proximity to an unaccompanied minor for fear I may do something awful to the child?
Simply by being seated in the right place at the wrong time, I’m effectively the dangerous stranger?
I understand how parents are scared to death for fear of their kids being entrapped by a paedophile. The mere thought of it scares me to death as well. Were I ever to witness someone sexually molesting a child, I would report the perpetrator to the police immediately. I would also do my best to intervene and separate the child from the criminal, even if the action posed a direct threat to my own safety.
Sexual molestation of a minor is abhorrent to me. Clearly it is also abhorrent to the great majority of other people.
As this crime is now better reported than previously, (check numerous studies compiled by the police, universities and social services bureaucracies), everyone is better served knowing that some men and fewer women, have a propensity to paedophilia.
Many religious institutions, sporting clubs, scouting societies and private religious schools are under scrutiny or investigation worldwide for allowing child sexual molestation to happen during their watch.
The abuses are now widely reported and the greater public has had its awareness raised to such an extent that paedophilia has become something of a social buzzword: to be named a ‘paedo’ is to be outcast forever from society, guilty or not guilty. It’s the smear that counts.
While mainstream tabloid media does what it does best, sensationalising the facts so as not to let them get in the way of a good story, many uninformed people are now caught in the slipstream of political correctness raised to near hysterical proportions.
Such as Tracey Spicer’s story about not letting her kids sit next to a man on a plane.
Fortunately I have sufficient self confidence so as not to take Spicer’s implied accusations directly to heart. Were it otherwise, I would seem less human, as if dirt flung at me would stick permanently, never feeling clean again.
Her story does however make me think more about how I travel unaccompanied these days.
If an unaccompanied minor is seated next to me on a plane, I will not take offense.
If a crew member asks me to move to another seat, I will question why.
If the answer is that an unaccompanied male seated next to a child poses an unnecessary risk to the absent parent’s peace of mind and the child’s safety, I will move to another window seat.
There I can focus on the view outside in contemplation about how sad this world has become when innocent people, kids and adults alike, are victimised through no fault of their own.